Life's Plans

            As I was finishing my Masters’ degree programs at Seton Hall I did not have the slightest inclination that I would be living in Iraq.  A majority of the job applications that I sent were in New York/New Jersey, Washington DC, New Hampshire, or Massachusetts.  Iraq was nowhere on my radar as far as employment prospects were concerned.  Yet, despite my best efforts to plan otherwise, an unexpected opportunity presented itself and here I am. 

In my three years of grad school I never even started to worry about the “next step” until graduation finally appeared on the horizon.  Many people had positions secured before graduation, and many others were frantically trying to join the club.  Despite graduating into a weak economy, I was confident that something would come up.  My confidence, working in tandem with my laid back attitude, led me to take the application process rather unhurriedly. 

In hindsight, there is certainly more that I could have done to a) explore all opportunities, b) make the most of personal contacts, and c) have things lined up in advance.  However, had my contrivances come to fruition, I would not be writing this blog.  Although there are difficulties, I am ultimately content with my decision to come here.  A book on choices, by Dr. Shad Helmstetter, noted, “The choices we make by accident are just as important as the choices we make by design.”  I find myself irresolute and indecisive on whether I should patiently seize opportunities as they come up or maintain focus on a clearly defined end goal. 

Although any decision on employment is, in all likelihood, 11 months away I still find myself facing this inner conflict.  My inner dalliance with the instantaneous wishes to sweep away any talks of the future until the time comes; the pragmatic, income-calculating realist is already spending nearly 30 minutes a day exploring job opportunities.  Clearly, the situation is not imperative, but the uncertainty of the dreaded unknown can be a lead weight around your neck.  For me personally, it isn’t so much the uncertainty of position that bothers me; it is the uncertainty of location.  I guess I should take heed of my current situation and tell my worries, “Listen, no matter what you have planned in life, you could just end up in Iraq.” 

Carpe Diem